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Saturday, May 31, 2008

...ready to go

I’m practically done with all my tasks and I’m just watching some videos to kill some time. “The Cutting Edge” and “Love Actually” are some of my favourites and I’m just watching it passively while doing some ironing and vacuum.

My cousin, Jackie, just went over to remind me about her party tonight. I thought it would just be “drink ‘till you drop thing” but hell, we have to be in formal. I don’t know, but after being drunk and wasted, would that really matter?

Anyway, I’ll see them tonight.

Friday, May 30, 2008

...lazy Friday

As usual, my Friday was lazy. Though I was productive, I pretty much done it all in a fraction of time. I was on fire, multi-tasking like there’s no tomorrow.

I even had my appointment at the doctor, finished the kit for a client and done all the documentation. The rest of the afternoon was trying and pretending to be busy. I guess, Fridays at the office is doomed to be like that. My officemate even told me to swap my Wednesday to my Friday to be more “productive”. Hmmmm…I don’t know but I just have to think about it next week.

I’m doing my laundry at the moment and I’m trying to sort my schedule tomorrow. I’ll be cleaning my room, iron my clothes, do some reading and have some rest. And since my cousin’s post birthday celebration will be at the pub tomorrow evening, I just have to do them all in the morning.

Anyway, I’m just waiting for my laundry to be done and watch videos to sleep.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

...not bad at all

I pretty had all the things secured for some reading on the weekend and I just have to scan over them later so I could expedite to how soon I could finish the book. I have to change some ways as I have become “laid back” when I arrived here. Life here in Oz has not much pressure compared to Davao and it’s about time to shake off being relaxed.

Since auntie is always late and walking to Ate Arlene’s place would not be enough to kill some time to meet her “on her time”, I went on a joy ride to Lara on bus after work. Hehehe. I know it would be boring and weird for some but I always see the positive side of everything. Not only I could explore the place on a bus, I could observe how the Aussies are on their public transport.

The Aussies were somewhat the same until a grumpy old lady who never stopped from blabbing her mouth to the driver, “fired” like World War III. She just didn’t like the way the bus stopped. While everyone was somewhat shocked, I wasn’t able to stop myself from laughing. I don’t know, but it was just funny. I could identify her from the old lady at Mr. Bean’s cartoon show. Remember that neighbour on the first floor? Not only that she looks like her, she was also exactly that grumpy. Hahaha. She just looked at me like her eyes pierced right through my head. I admit, it scared me but I guess, I also scared her with my laugh. hahaha

Anyway, I’ll watch “Little Manhattan” to sleep.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

...getting on the "track"

Pretty loaded for the day but it never stopped me from thinking in between tasks on what to do on the next few days. I really have to do something with my schedule as I have so much to do. I have to finish some books, learn and relearn some concepts and focus on a hobby. At this point of time, I’m still thinking to where I should concentrate with factors like money and how soon will I get bored with it. Hopefully I could make up my mind by weekend as I have to get things in order.

Of course, to start those things, I am thinking of rearranging my room. I only have one chair and its not really good reading a book on it. I hope I could get some comfortable chair from auntie or maybe another table, low enough to sit comfortably on the floor.

And with reading a plethora of references, which, I have to trim down to the least, I am going to start like one to two chapters a night, depending on its length. I’m also searching cheap books on eBay as it’s such an ordeal, reading the ebook on a computer screen. I really had enough of the computer for a day.

Anyway, I just have to condition myself for this and hopefully, I’ll be on track.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

...flat Tuesday

I was late at work. I had an “appointment” and had my X-Ray done. Things went ok and I have to be back on Friday and Tuesday for more things to do.

Work was still ok. Everything was pretty much covered. Not really hectic so I had some time reading some interesting stuff. In a way, I was entertained inside the IT room that’s too big the one man army. And as usual, I had my tunes on the background to keep myself on the roll.

I’m also happy to receive an email from the shop where I bought the books. It’ll arrive in 5 to 7 days. I hope the Aussie Post will be quick enough to have it on my doorstep soon. I just can’t wait any longer.

Anyway, I just have to watch Wayne's World to sleep.

Ow, it’s nice to see the “girl” ok today. She’s pretty much at peace compared yesterday. At least, it feels good and everyone's happy.

Monday, May 26, 2008

...and it was Monday

Monday’s just ok. I was somewhat busy and started to fix the IT room. I chucked off the boxes and rearranged the old machines. Got rid of the dodgy proxy and deployed the new one. So far everything was doing great.

I also did some editing to one of the pages of the school’s website and read some new things to learn along the way.

Walking through the corridors also gives you the time in knowing what’s going on. Some students are courteous enough to exchange hellos and some just walk past to you like there’s no one around. In a way, I tend to learn from the people on what they are and how they do by just looking at their faces. It’s like getting to know them bit by bit until they knock on my door to ask for some assistance.

While I was going back to the room, I noticed this girl who was trying hard not to cry. Her eyes were somewhat red while trying to get some comfort from her friend. Looking at her just made me felt like I have to do something. I felt sad and I just hate it when people cry. I could just imagine how hard she might be into that thing, trying to rationalize things. With that, I was feeling “heavy”, like I’m with her through her troubled times. I don’t know, I really have this thing about trying to fight back for someone. I just hate it, especially when the weak and powerless are being harassed by the people who just think for their convenience.

*sigh

Anyway, I tried to get away from it by just doing the tasks. I hope she’ll be fine soon and be happy. I hope to see her smiling tomorrow.

I also bought the 6 “Bob Ong” books online. It’ll be here in 7-12 days after 2-3 days of preparing my order. I’m just excited and I’ll be reading it over and over again. That could be a riot as his books are very funny and entertaining.

So, I hope to have a good day tomorrow.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Lazy Sunday

Well, my Sunday was pretty much lazy. For the first time since I arrived here in Oz, I slept like 12 hours as I went to bed early last night like 9 pm. Haha. I guess I was just tired or maybe with the cold weather.

I woke up about 9 am and fixed my room. Took my shower and had breakfast like 11:30 AM. It was cold but that never stopped me from going to town. I just wore sufficient layers of clothing and a scarf to seal some heat. You know, I ride with my bike. (As Aussies call it “push bike” even though you pedal with it. Maybe when you want to push something here, you say, pedal it. Hahaha)

At town, I tried to look around for some jacket but they were either pricey or doesn’t fit to my taste. I’m thinking of going to Melbourne on Saturday for that and at the same time, go around and visit some bookstores.

With some time left, I went to Eastern Beach and relaxed while facing the bay. The wind was pretty cold but I enjoyed it. From a far, I could still see the Helicopter Flights and hopefully I could try it someday soon.

Anyway, I was home at about 5 pm and watched Batman and Robin, the 1949 movie serial collection. I should say, Batman and Robin are so hardcore as they don’t have any gadgets to stop the villains. Robin really had this very funny curly hair and Batman has borrowed the belt from Santa Claus.

Hmmmm…Have you seen the new Indiana Jones movie? It’s pretty funny for some scenes where his hat doesn’t get detached from his head even with some physically challenged scenes.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

...on a loaded Saturday

I woke up at 6 am on a chilly morning. I guess it was 5˚C as condensed air appears when I breathe. I know it would be better to stay longer in bed but I have to jump out of it as I have lots of things to do for the day.

First was the driving lesson. I pretty much enjoyed the ride as we went on a 80, 90 to 100 kph zone. I did nail it as it was much like of an arcade game. Lane changes were also good but I just have to maintain my speed while doing it. So far, my instructress was happy.

Second was my weekly role as the Iron Man. I just have to iron my shirts to make my things tidy and orderly. In a way, I’m fed up with it but there’s no one to do it but me.

Third was fixing my bike. I bought some spare tubes last mother’s day and it’s about time to install them. I’m not really good at it but I was able to fit it properly. I think it took me about 30 min. That’s way too long as I have to get into my next schedule.

Fourth was my date with myself. I invited myself to watch Indiana Jones at town and I’m just ok with the movie. Though their tandem (Shia and Harrison) was good, I just miss Sean and Harrison with their father and son arguments. The movie doesn’t have that much adventure, funny quotes and puzzles where you could think and enjoy. Unlike with the past installments, it was all being laid down and pretty much straight forward.

I just hate the part where Indy was talking about his father. That reminds me of our relationship with our papa. *sigh. I just feel sad knowing that the rest of my friends back home have their father talking to them and always there to support.

Anyway, just to make things better, I got myself the Indian Jones/Popcorn combo. At least, I can keep the tumbler.

Hmmm…and I guess, I just have to install flashlight on my bike as it was a struggle going through the night. I actually dived on waterless dirt after I struck on a piece of wood. Or perhaps install a heater as it was very cold. hahaha

...don't just trust anybody

Just got home from the “party” and I should say, it was just “so-so”. It was just a drinking party where you could just flash your wrist band to get some drinks at the bar.

Well, everything went fine and decided to go somewhere after some few drinks. We went to 4Play and wasted some time, drinking vodka. It was pretty much like the 80s where the “kids” just danced and “shuffled” like crazy on a “Michael Jackson” floor. Alcohol really does wonders as you could see how tipsy they were.

After that, we went to “Level 1” as my “mates” and I “settled” for the moment. Before we ordered our drinks, they decided to take a leak as I waited for them. Thirty minutes, after, there were still beyond my reach and decided to go after them. They were actually, “lost” and were like trying to satisfy their ego by leaving me on my seat, trying to make a dummy out of me, like I am waiting for no one.

“Ok”, as long as it satisfies their ego as I could see them how they laugh at my expense. In this side of the world, it’s really hard to find some “friends” whom you could be yourself or trust. I guess I should be just looking at myself and try not to trust anybody that quick. At least, at this point of time, I know who amongst them are to be thrashed.

But actually, that’s pretty gay of them to do that. If I have to be back in time as I was in high school, I really don’t know how they would find themselves if they try to rationalize my way.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

...passively on the roll

I’m glad that everything has been doing great. The new proxy server has worked well and I’m happy that my day has been somewhat relaxed.

It was just a normal morning with all the backups monitored, shuffled between backup tapes and attended to some staff and students’ concerns. Thursdays so far has been a “lazy” day for me as everyone seems to be passive with everything. Anyway, for the rest of the day, I just did some reading while playing Meshuggah.

As usual, I walked from school to meet auntie at Ate Arlene’s house. Walking was great as I was thinking a lot on some personal projects to do. It’s like scribbling in my head, having some if-then-else and for loops while trying to get my “spurs of the moment” to work.

Hopefully, I could get things rolling on the weekend.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

A Plan to Sanity Pt. 2

Work for the past days has been good as much of it has been delivered. I just have to tweak some as unseen factors have to be uprooted. It’s just that, with the present setup, much has to be done in documenting to get things easier. *sigh. If I were to decide, I just have to chuck some and rebuild some.

*sigh…

Anyway, as much as I like being busy, I just hate the aftermath. It’s just that, the deafening silence just makes me sad. Loneliness is just building from nothingness. This is what you get when you are in a way, isolated.

But I am a fighter and adapts to environment pretty good. Though I got my auntie and my cousins here, I don’t really feel comfortable talking to them like I do with my mama, family and friends back in Davao. And to make things work for the moment, I am making friends with myself just to feel better; like having an imaginary friend. Pretty much like looking after myself. Its not that I am losing my mind; (Yeah! I don’t talk to myself), it’s the only thing left for me to become sane. Its like, when you are left with nothing, all you do is speculate. I guess I am back being the social anti-social. I know it’s not good but its something that works for the moment.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

...satisfied.

My day’s pretty loaded as I have allotted myself to fix the proxy first thing in the morning. As soon as I stepped on the school’s ground, I went straight to my room and did what was necessary. Since I had the OS, ISA Server and all its service packs installed on the “substitute proxy” yesterday, I just did some configuration and tweaking for it to be accommodated on the network.

So far, I am happy with the results. The users were able to get through it and the program has accommodated all what was required. I know the “substitute” would be dodgy soon as it’s like a very old machine. Something like 3 years plus. With that, I had my plan B rolling as I installed another one on a much “stronger” machine.

It’s also my 2nd day to walk to Ate Arlene’s home as auntie and I decided to meet there for their exercise. Well, pretty much like a 30 min walk from school as it’s also a good time to walk, flex some rusty joints and listen to my tunes. My route goes like Goldsworthy, Bacchus Marsh Rd., Cox Rd., Thompson Rd., Darebin St, Peacock Ave., Bellnore Dr., Candellow Crescent and Turill Ct.

I guess I just have to get myself some walking shoes to make myself comfortable in doing it. And maybe make a playlist for walking. Some thrash metal would be good.

Hmmmm. I’m also thinking of inviting myself to watch Indiana Jones on the weekend.

Monday, May 19, 2008

...my substitute family, work

Just got home from Ate Arlene’s home and I just love having dinner with them. It’s not just the food but the people around the table that makes eating great. The conversations and the time being spent with them just feels like home. Her kids felt like my brothers and it’s a good feeling when I share what I’ve learned back home. Especially with some tricks that surprisingly blew them away.

In a way, though their mum is a Filipina, they haven’t got much of the childhood experiences we used to enjoy. The simplicity of our life when were growing up just makes the conversations to the young enjoyable. I mean, there are a lot to tell and its fun sharing it. I sometimes can’t help but laugh to some and reminisce like it was light years ago. I wonder how this generation would be when they try to tell their side of their story. I guess, it has something to do with how kids are on their present environment.

Anyway, I hope I could finish everything tomorrow with the test proxy in the morning. It has been a pain going through all of the troubleshooting as everything went to the end of its life. I have already installed the OS, the ISA Server and its service packs. I just have to do things quick with the configuration so everything would be going smooth.

So, it’s like 9:50 pm and I’ll be watching some videos to sleep.

Night night!

Sunday, May 18, 2008

...hangover

I just got home from last night’s drinking and so far, I am still coping with the hangover. Hehehe

Drinking here is pretty much different compared back home as you just have to bring your own alcohol. With that, I got myself a 6 pack vodka-cola mix as I don’t want to get wasted into an unchartered territory.

Well, it was ok. Had some conversations with some people and as usual, they find me weird. Haha. I guess, it has something to do with me, being an Asian. I felt like I was on “Ripley’s Believe it or Not”.

It was almost 12 when my cousin and I decided to go my other cousin’s place. We just exchanged hellos and went back to her place to play Wii. Watching Mario just made me want to vomit. I should say, no Wii when drunk.

I slept on the couch and woke up at about 8:45 am. Since everyone was still on bed, I forced myself to sleep until everyone was ready.

At about 2:40 pm, I went home, pretty much starving.

I should have dropped at Nando’s.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

A plan to sanity

Being “isolated” for months just seems to make you paranoid.

Well, I am approximately 2 months away to my 1st year in Oz and it has been a struggle being the “social” that I was to just stay within the “limits” of my domain. I should say, I had a hard time coping with just talking to myself about what I’ve been through. Though I could talk to friends online, it’s very much different when you come to talk with someone, face to face and get reactions at an instant. And most of the time, they are not there too.

If Google is human or a thing that could answer almost everything, I should have done that in finding friends within a radius. Let’s say within 25 kms from where I live now.

Having those things, I am in a way trying to “adapt”. In meeting new people, I am actually treating them now as “acquaintances” as it’s really hard to find one here in Geelong. I don’t know, I just want someone whom I could talk to or just be there to become myself.

*sigh. It’s really hard to be back in my room to just stare at the monitor, thinking they could also talk back. With my usual “stare at my PC until I sleep”, I should say, I should do some variations. Perhaps, learn to sleep early or ignore to ignore what has to be ignored.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

...missing Pinoy food

And finally, after weeks of eating “Aussie”, its Pinoy time on the table for tonight. Auntie had bariles (tuna) soup and it was nice and fit for the cold weather. I literally devoured my share as I really miss this kind of food.

I can still remember the days where my friends and I used to be at the “carinderya” (eatery) to treat ourselves with “SuTuKil” (sound like Shoot To Kill. Its an acronym for Sugba, Tuwa and Kilaw where Sugba is Grilled, Tuwa is Stew and Kilaw is raw fish cooked in vinegar with lots of ginger, onions, cucumber). Where fish, usually tuna, is freshly sliced, cooked and served right into your table.

*sigh. I just miss eating Pinoy food with my friends. I’m actually thinking of Sana’s shredded tapa. Whoa!!!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Amazing!!!

And again, with the "blog hopping" thing, I am just happy to have met Ramesh online.

Ramesh is one of my friends in Ateneo Grade School when I was in grade 5 (I usually go with him, Jonathan Barez and Leo Avellanosa). We were in 321 Balagtas with Mrs. Jeanna Padillo-Solis as our teacher. I can still remember him as one of the great orators and never fail to lift his pants before he does his thing. We were in the same softball team, same war games team (usually general section vs. honor’s class at the backfield/garden with wooden planks as guns) and sometimes have lunch at his house. I also love their “afritadang baka” as the memories are still vivid. I can still remember their very large chest freezer filled with so much food in it.

The very last time I saw him was when we had our softball practice at the backfield. Their brown car went past the back exit of the school as Jonathan and I was trying to run after them. His face was leaning on the car window and was very sad, looking at the field as if we were not there. Since that time, we lost touch of him.

And after almost 2 decades, I have finally seen him on my site. With MyBlogLogs and blogs, I just find it amazing how it made the world so small.

You can visit his page here and try to know our place with his blogs.

...work, atheism, ego

Nothing much for the day as it was again the usual home and work routine. Though I knew that this would be coming, I tried my best to make things worthwhile for myself.

I’ve done the “skeleton” for the school’s website and I am very happy that the principal was happy too. I just have to get more content as I just want it working as it should be. And so far, I am satisfied with the results.

I also did some blog hopping and as usual, I am very much entertained to the people who never fail to entertain me. It’s just that, at their age, they remain to be that “i am smart ‘cause i know it all and the rest of you are dumb ‘cause you’re not within my level”.

* “atheist” on this post pertains to people who think they are atheist. At this point, it requires to be defined in a way “atheist” define people outside their domain...but it’s not stroking my ego. hehe

With topics like atheism, it has always been my thing to just laugh at people who just defend it like they’re the authority. I mean, with topics like that, each side has its point but the thing of labelling the other for not syncing with their “authority” is just as funny as kids outdo each other. Well, the kids are cute but not this person.

The feeling of being “transcendental” has obviously clouded this person’s head; that believing in God is arrogance. I have met a lot of “atheist” but never have seen this “atheist” with the ego the size of Mt. Everest. I should say, 98% of the “atheists” I have met were just projecting to be smart. You know, the “image” that they love has been stroking their ego so good.

I don’t have problems with “atheist” per se but their thing of pinning everyone because everybody didn’t get their point is just as disturbing as organized religion. We just have to realize that not everybody has the same thought as everyone has been brought up uniquely by their own parents and their unique environment; that even twins don’t share the same thoughts, that I believe we are different to learn from each other.

But I guess, with further reading to his reactions, his ego has to be stroked 24/7/356.

Monday, May 12, 2008

..flat line

Just got home and I just have to go to bed. Not much for this day as never in blue hell did I have something interesting. Same work and house routine and went to a family friend’s house. I just played computer games with Ate Arlene’s kids and it was fun.

Anyway, I’ll be back tomorrow. Lights out!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Mother's Day without my Mama

I went to bed around 4 in the morning and went up at about 9. It was gloomy and I felt like not going out of my room. But since auntie and I had to go to church, I forced myself out of the bed and did what was necessary.

As usual, we were late for church. Auntie really has this thing about time management. She is always late that even uncle has told us that she would be late for her funeral. Well, it’s just this “Filipino Time” that she has in her blood. That Filipinos are always late but for me, auntie is from the future. She just happens to be playing with time and enjoying every bit of it. Hahahah

Anyway, after the mass, auntie and I had lunch with my cousins, Kathleen and Jacky. It was great as auntie was very happy considering that she has seen her girls on mother’s day, celebrating. They went shopping and just spent time with each other. And for me, I am just the one who carried their stuff.

Thinking about it just makes me miss my mama more. I know we have in a way “adjusted”, having not there for each other on mother’s day just make me sad. I know as we had a chat yesterday about this day and she was quite not ok about it. Actually, she was teary eyed. *sigh.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

...home

I really thought Saturday would be loaded but from what I had for the day, not much as I have expected. The usual, “iron man” thing, driving lessons and watch videos until I get sleepy were religiously done. I also did them all as early and fast as possible to meet some new friends tonight but to my dismay, it was cancelled.

And again, the plan that doesn’t fail has always been there. I guess, I’m bound to stay at home to be with myself. Not much fun but I just have to deal with it…for the moment.

Friday, May 09, 2008

It's Friday!!! YeeHaa!!!

Home at about 9 PM and as usual, the preparations for the next week’s work are on the loose. I’m actually having my laundry spinning; I’ll arrange my desk after the laundry and will be staring the screen until I sleep. Since I’ll have my lessons at 2 PM tomorrow, I have to be early to fix my bike and vacuum the carpet. Not much excitement as everything would be much like what it used to be.

Everyone’s going to have their own schedules as auntie and uncle will be at Darlington to watch some Super Rods racing. My cousin Robert would be moving out with his girlfriend and I’ll be drinking with Camille tomorrow night at town. This would be good as this would be my first time to actually let loose of myself since I arrived last year. Its like everything has been unfolding and I’m just happy to get back to what I used to be.

Anyway, I’ll be arranging my desk now.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

...enjoying work and starting to socialize

Today’s just a normal day and getting through all the tasks was just as easy as getting things done within reach. In a way, everything has been manageable and I hope things will be the same on the days to come.

So far, I am still trying to learn some new stuff for the school’s website. I’ve been looking for books at Angus and Robertson online and I just have to confirm of its availability here in Geelong tomorrow. I hope they have that as getting to Melbourne just takes so much time as I have to do something for my bike on the weekend.

And finally, I was able to have my first Aussie pub experience. Actually, if it isn’t for Kristen, I couldn’t set my foot there as she was such a sweetheart in keeping me company and driving me home. The pub was just actually meters away from home but never thought of drinking until some random spurs-of-the-moment. Not that bad and I enjoyed chatting with Kristen too which is really a big bonus for me.

Tomorrow’s Friday and I’m just excited for the weekend. I just have to get something for my bike and do things for myself this time.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

...busy day and the WYD Cross and Icon

Today’s work was in a way, loaded. I made it sure that I had everything done in the morning so I could play with Wordpress for the school’s website in the afternoon. So far, with their ever famous 5 point installation, I had it loaded on their server with not much fuss.

At first, I was thinking of putting Joomla or Mambo but decided to have WP. It has a small footprint and in a way, manageable. Though it was technically designed for blogging, I guess, it would be ok for a school website with some tweaking.

Anyway, the World Youth Day Cross and Icon has arrived here in Geelong. Both are currently staying at St. Mary of the Angels Parish and it’s a good time to visit them before they will be leaving for Hobart and to Sydney for the World Youth Day celebration.



It’s nice to have touched and prayed in front of it. You can just feel how it travelled across the world to remind the people of its message. I can still remember the WYD celebration in Manila where the whole country was very much blessed with the Holy Father, leading the event. How I wish I could be in Sydney for that.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

...getting back on track

This day has been great. I have done what has to be done and I am happy that I have satisfied the people I have served. This is just a good feeling.

I have updated the school’s website content but I have expressed my wishes to have that revamped. The way that it was made was so elementary and updating it has become cumbersome. Anyway, I am happy that the principal was ok with my suggestion. I just have to find ways on how to do that soon.

With that, I now have time to clean everything in our office. Computers were like everywhere and it’s about time to have them arranged. I am somewhat on track with myself as I am feeling better. I guess, it has something to do with some “happy foods” that helped me feel happy. I’ve read something on the newspaper about eating fruits and veggies would just help you feel better.

So, no more soda and lollies for me?

Monday, May 05, 2008

Blue Monday

This day was the busiest. As soon as I stepped in to our room, I ran through the list of what to dos and just went doing it all. Did backups to the servers, restored some images, fixed heaps of laptops and PCs and assisted the staff and students with their queries. I’m glad that everything went fine and finished the day with some tunes to listen.

While waiting to be fetched, I realized how hard it is being isolated. For weeks, I have been trying to get hold of my sanity and it was a struggle getting myself on track. I was happy to have found some friends but having them seems to be very different compared back home. Some were “fair weather”, some are passive and some are leaving soon. This is something that I really don’t like of being attached.

When I was doing my paper works for Australia, I said to myself that I shouldn’t be attached or should be doing things that would end me loving it. Those days were the best days of my life and leaving for Oz was the worst feeling so far.

I guess, I just have to do something like not to be very attached with anybody…That I should be in a way treating them as “acquaintances”. I don’t know but I think this would just ease the pain of saying goodbye.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

...On a Sunday

I woke up early today. It was 7 am and I was feeling blue. I don’t know but the emptiness that has been plaguing me for the past days has in a way returned for a visit. I was bothered. I felt like crying.

I tried to brush it off by turning my tunes as loud as my computer can. In a way, I felt better and started to prepare for the day. I took my shower, get dressed, had some toast, and filled some air to my trusty rusty bike’s tire (the rear tire always ran out of air).

I went off at about 10:30 AM and went straight to church. I felt better and the homily has helped me a lot with my situation. Anyway, after the mass, I went to the computer swap meet then to the WaterFront.

Sitting on the edge of the concrete, while facing the bay felt like facing my entire burden. The waters were hitting the wall like telling me to let it all out. I was teary eyed and felt so lonely. I screamed and the cold wind muffled it like a friend that is always ready to listen. I just don’t know. I guess I just miss home, my family and my friends. I am getting so “isolated”.

With that, I just went to whatever random I could think of. I had so much potato wedges and chicken for lunch. Bought some sweaters and decided to watch Iron Man the second time.



5:20 PM when I went out of the theatre and walked to my bike. The walk going to my bike has turned out to be the longest walk of my life (in Oz) as my bike has failed me. The rear tire has finally given in. I walked, pushing it from the city to the nearest petrol station. The bike seems to be heavier as it was technically rolling with no air. At the petrol station, it wasn’t filling as I felt a puncture on one side of the tire. With that, the walk going home was a torture. The bike and the cold wind just made it worse.

7:00 PM and I was home. Exhausted and was very tired to feel blue. I guess having the worse could also be good.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

What a day!!!

Today’s a good day and I am happy to brush off some negative thoughts. I woke up early and was refreshed; Very much ready for the day.

I had my driving lessons and I am happy that I was being booked by my instructress on July for my tests. I also did well with my lessons and I am happy that my instructress was also happy. Though there are some “glitches”, I am somewhat driving like an educated Aussie driver. Hehehe. I also have to get away with my multi-tasking nature during driving as I was told to do things at a time. I don’t know what she meant but I think it has something to do with my thing on intersections and speed. That I roll while checking for clearance. Don’t you think I should do that? Anyway, I just have to ask her about that next week.

After the lessons, I went home and filled some air to my trusty rusty bike’s tire. Got everything prepared and went as fast as I could. (I don’t want to be late for the movie). After almost 30 min of pushing, I chained my bike behind Market Square and hurriedly went to the theatre.

The line was so long. I was like the 20th of the queue but was very surprised when the theatre was like 8 to 10% occupied. I think it’s like having a 500 seating capacity. If I have to compare it with NCCC Cinemas back home, it’s almost as big as that but the screen is just too small.

The movie was great. (Sorry, I’m biased to Marvel Movies and Animations). I was like a trivia machine while I was watching it. I could easily identify some small bits a normal viewer wouldn’t see. The very classic 1960s Iron Man theme song was being played at the casino, Stan Lee was again on cameo with the blondes (always at every Marvel movie) and the director was playing Tony Stark’s bodyguard. Just like a kid, I isolated myself as I was watching it like frame by frame. Hahahaha

I also got a surprise meet with my “chatmate” few nights ago. While trying to put my rubbish in the bin, an Asian looking lady approached me and asked if my name was “Aldrin”. With “flashbacks” running on my head (could it be my aunt’s friend, etc.), I confusedly uttered with confirmation. She happens to be my chatmate’s mum. I happily introduced myself to them and had some chatting. That really was my surprise for the day.

...finishing the week

I am in way trying to become “OK” and so far, I am very much on track in getting back. This day has somewhat helped me forget the emptiness and I am just very thankful.

Work at the office today was just right to become occupied. I had to open my desktop PC for its “image” has to be “restored” to another machine. I’m glad that I brought the laptop to continue some “googling” for answers and fixing some dodgy servers remotely. It was just a very normal Friday at the office.

I went home at about 7 pm and did my laundry. I had a quick dinner, read my e-mails and stared at the screen for most of the time. I also checked the movie schedule online as I am going to watch Iron Man.

I have also seen a video at Nine MSN on Aussie Athletes complaining about China's food ban. And even the famous Vegemite, didn’t even escaped to China’s policy in restricting it to coming to the Olympics. The Aussie Athletes were not happy about it as they just want to bring their own supply to perform their best. That they just can’t imagine eating something that they’re not used to. In fact, a shipment containing their supply is very much ready.

Hmmmm. With that, I should say, the Aussie Athletes should follow what China has for the Olympics. Unreasonable it may be but it’s just like Australia’s own quarantine thing. Where immigrants are not allowed to bring anything that is prohibited for its advantage. Very much like “Border Security”. I can imagine China having its own version and trying to interrogate Aussies at the airport. I think, it’s about time to try some chicken feet for breakfast. hehe

Anyway, I hope to wake up refreshed tomorrow.

Thursday, May 01, 2008

...and again

I’m still trying to get myself on track. This emptiness is just filling within me that it has occupied much of my senses. I just realized that I forgot my black notebook at school and it feels like I lost a lot today.

Anyway, I just have to call Roger tomorrow to have that secured and reunite with it on Monday.

*sigh

I don’t know but my iPod seems to be “with me”. While waiting to be fetched, (as usual, Auntie was late again), the tunes just tried to play with my mood. With majority of my tunes are on metal and on shuffle mode, the sad songs just squeezed their way through my earphones. The weird thing was, even when I did some clicking on "next track", it took me 3 to 4 clicks just to get out of the mood. I guess I just miss home that much.

Hopefully, I could wake up tomorrow without this emptiness.

...stop! forward! where?!

Have you been in a situation where you end up feeling empty after a very good day? Well, in my case, I’ve been into that many times. Never in blue hell could I count them as it has become a normal thing after so much of those good moments. I guess it has something to do with running out of it that emptiness just creeps right over it.

For months, majority of my life has been on a plateau. Not much to cheer upon and not much to get things on a roller coaster. Unlike back home in the Philippines, though financially not capable, I can do things easily and go wherever I would go; where everything is pretty much accessible. I can watch movies with my friends or go to places and become silly without the thought of being tied to somebody. Here, I’m pretty much limited that even going to work has to be done with the help of my uncle or auntie.

*sigh. How I wish I could get my license soon and get a decent car just to get around and explore more.

Anyway, after months of waiting, one of my favorite Marvel Superheroes is finally on the big screen. I pretty much know the story but I just want to see how it would be on this movie. I just love the armor and everything that goes with it. I also find it good that the soundtrack is guitar based. It just sounds so heavy. I hope it will equate with the mood and the scenes.

Hopefully, I could be done earlier on Saturday so I could watch it. *sigh. Though I’m used to watching movies alone in the Philippines, this would be pretty much different as it would be “just me” on an different setting. I just find it too lonely.